If It Weren't For Bad Luck, He'd Have No Luck At All

     The hillbilly farmers of Hee Haw whined about gloom, despair and agony, but their problems were pale in comparison to those of Laurens farmer Jim Thomas.  Ol' Jim lost six of his finest swine when they swallowed some calcium arsenate and died.  Jim set out to clean out their pen and start out with a clean and healthy drift of pork producers. 

Jim's chickens made their way into the sty and did what chickens do.  They scratched the dirt.    The ignorant poultry ate the still poison infested soil and joined their fellow barnyard animals in Hog Heaven.    Jim talked about giving up raising hogs and chickens for good, thinking that he would never have any luck at producing either one again. (Macon Telegraph, 1-6-1921)